Last night, our church, Long Beach Christian Fellowship,
created a space which allowed us to walk in the story of Good Friday. It began
at the meal, which Jesus deeply desired to share with his disciples and ended
at the cross.
As part of the interactive experience, we were given a book
which held the scriptures which told the story. It had large text and wide
margins. We were also given a pen, and were encouraged to interact with the
text by underlining, circling, drawing lines of connection, and writing our
reflections and responses to what we were reading.
At one point in our journey, we were provided with colored pencils,
markers and crayons and were invited to move beyond lines and circles and
words, to capture what we were experiencing in the text in the form of art and symbols.
If stain glass was designed to help an illiterate people to be able to
internalize the written word of God, this exercise seemed to be an invitation
for a literate people to take the written word of God and allow it to become
living and active. It was a new way to interact with Scripture for me, and it
was powerful.
When we had finished the journey from the table to the
cross we went to dinner with our friends, who had accompanied us on this journey. After dinner, we headed back to our home, spending a couple of hours sharing our books and verbalizing
how this experience with the scriptures had landed on our hearts. How beautiful it
was to see both the unity of what God had been speaking to us, and also to have
the experince of sharing of that reality be a place where God was continuing to speak.
If you could lay our books side by side, you would find we
were all impacted by Jesus’ desire to share the meal with his disciples and the
intimacy of that moment. We were all stirred by our own sin, and Jesus’
willingness to bear it, for our good and the fulfillment of the Lord’s good
plan.
In my book words were circled like;
We turned our back
Did not care
We left God
Our rebellion
Besides these words were others that were circled and linked
to them like;
Our sorrows weighed him down
He was pierced
Crushed
Beaten
Whipped
Oppressed
Treated harshly
Struck down
Yet he never said a word
It is powerful to hold these words in connection to one another, to let the reality of how they are related to each other penetrate
your mind and sink deeply into your soul. As you do, other words on the page
begin to stand out, words like;
So we could be whole
And healed
Counted as righteous
Holy
Loved
by the Father
As He loved the son
Belong
Filled with my joy
Experience perfect unity
Given glory
Eternal life
These last words speak of our becoming because of Jesus’
willingness, even deep delight, to not only share a meal, but to take on our
weakness, sorrows, and sins. What a beautiful reality to be given space to hold
and absorb. What deep joy flows from it.
There was one phrase I circled, which left my heart sad, not
one of them was lost, except the one headed for destruction. They are words of prophesy,
foretelling Judas’ betrayal of Jesus. My heart grieves at this disciple of
Christ, who could not lay down his own expectation for how things should play
out and took matters into his own hands.
We don’t know whether he betrayed Jesus because of his disappointment
that Christ was not bringing about the ending Judas desired, or as a way of forcing
Jesus’ hand, hoping he would finally bring about the downfall of their Roman oppressors.
What we do know is that Judas would come to regret his decision. He would return
the blood money he had been given, and he would hang himself. He indeed was
headed for destruction.
In the circling of these words my heart both was acknowledging
the sadness of Judas’ journey, and the desire which stirs in me that somehow, some
way, Judas would be rescued from his hardened heart and rash decision.
As I sit with this desire, as I ponder what gives birth to
it, I have no other explanation than it is the desire of God. The same God who
could see me before the foundations of the world, and knew I would go my own
way. Who understood my lack of care, my turning of my back, and my rebellion
were all signs that I too was headed for destruction. In a very real way, Judas and I are brothers.
God's response to this reality, born out of
a love that I still cannot fully fathom, was to send His own son, whom He
loved, to shoulder the weight of my hard heart and rash decisions. He would willingly be inflicted and punished for my sin and rebellion, so that I might be not only be rescued, but
receive life and joy and sonship. Christ has become my brother.
This was God's deep desire, his good plan, and
the more the wonder of it all sinks into my soul, the more it becomes my desire. It's presence is a sign that the traces of the sacred
are being written in my heart.
Our Good Friday experience helped to etch it deeper still.
